love me some ionesco...& french...

yeah

"On ne peut pas vivre mal, c'est une contradiction."
{Eugène Ionesco, Extrait de Le roi se meurt}

i said i'd be back with more a bit later on, and here i am!


y'all know that i've been looking for a job since july, basically... but the job hunt really hasn't been going well, at all.  i mean, life's been moving along rather well... i've gotten to work on 2 phenomenal shows (in rapid succession, too) & met some fabulous folks, so i'm pretty hesitant to complain about life, in general.  however, i've been kind of in a financial downward spiral as of late, & i had a mini nervous breakdown yesterday after speaking with cami a bit... "frustration nation" has been the name of the game!  so yeah.  i put up an away message expressing my urgent need for a job, & allison gtalked me (woman is freakin' phenomenal) in response.  she suggested that i e-mail her friend, who is in desperate need of assistance these days, & so i did.  i sent my resume & a bit of a cover letter to this woman, & allison introduced us after the show, last night.  she said that she would give me a call the next day (so, today)...

woke up this morning after a rough night's sleep (if you can even call it that, haha) & hopped in the shower.  when i shower, i think.  i love shower time... it's a very introspective time for me.  sounds weird, i know, but it's peaceful & yeah...whatever!  :)  so basically this morning, i was still feeling a little wonky from the mini breakdown yesterday, & so i got to thinking.  i remembered a conversation i had with my friend laura about a week & a half ago.  she brought up a current situation in her life & mentioned the notion of having to ask God for things... now, i've always considered myself a faithful person... though i'm not s'much into the whole organized religion shindig, y'know?  but, that conversation popped back into my head while i was in the shower this morning... & i started to think about the way the past couple of days have been going for me...

basically, i realized that i haven't been all that strong, as of late.  i mean, i consider myself a pretty strong individual, but i've been hella weak lately.  so i asked God to help me find strength to deal with all kinds of things... strength to deal with the money situation, the job situation, & strength to stop trying too hard.  i've been trying too hard, these days... which isn't always bad, but i'm currently referring to trying too hard for results... for something to happen, & to happen how i think i want it to happen! 

so, i got out of the shower, feeling semi-rejuvenated & semi-exhausted...i googled free will astrology & checked out my horoscope for this week.  very fitting :)  immediately after i started typing my last LJ entry (with the horoscope), i got a phone call... & with that phone call came a job.  a temporary job, but a job nonetheless... 


so yeah... God gave me strength before i even asked for it.  b/c i had the strength to ask in the first place. 

& i think that's swell :)

so yeah... if you hear me say "goddammit" anytime from now on, smack me, okay?  i figure i at least owe Him removing that from my vocab... & replacing it with a bit more positive communication


anyway.  i have to work in the morning, so i guess i should sleep :D

g'night kids!